Monday, July 10, 2006

The difference between loving someone and being in love with them

Love, in general, is an oft used, oft abused word. I believe it was originally used to describe the bond one shared with family or god. But nowadays its used quite loosely- like "I love Tom Cruise", or " I love that car " ... hence it has become imperative that certain prefixes or suffixes be added to the word in order to convey its exact usage.

Romantic love- which is the most commonly used application of the word and contrary to popular belief , it is where it has a number of meanings. The difference we are referring to is not merely a measure of the depth of one’s feelings - it is on the other hand, a precise definition of what the feeling actually IS .........

When u love some1 u [or at least I] want to make them happy at any cost and keep them that way......... when u love some1 u direct all ur efforts to make their dreams come true.
When u love some1 u don’t care about what ur relationship with the person is, as long as u can love them. Love is pretty unselfish in this form and expects nothing in return...when u love some1 the only pleasure u derive is in giving.

When, on the other hand, u are in love with some1 they become ur ultimate ambition. The feeling in this case must necessarily be mutual- it is an explosive drive that leads to destruction- but sweet destruction. ur actions then serve no purpose but to further that desire , and there is no rationality governing them. The world starts and ends in ur relationship... when u are in love with some1 the "WE" is more imp than the "I". when u are in love with some1 u don’t need to contemplate as to what is good, bad or ugly.......
u are no longer in control of what u give or take... it just happens..

In conclusion- loving some1 is voluntary service- but being in love with some1 is involuntary surrender


Another mail I wrote to someone a long long time back. At 19 I had the whole world figured out..now I am not so sure

6 comments:

Abhay said...

boy, u really had tht figured out @ 19 , way to go..... quite insightful btw, nice post

Anonymous said...

No, actually you're exactly right. And I'm 29. And pray that who ever's in your life loves you, and wants your happiness.

Perspective Inc. said...

Wow..beautifully put..but am not sure its that easy..there are just too many damn grey areas...

lushrains said...

Poetic, romantic.

wasted said...

thats some critique and research on love I must say...anyways try putting to words what you feel about 'Love', now when you are 23/24. Its amazing how we grow and ad new meanings to things we thought we had defined already.

Kim said...

Love at that time was pure and causeless coz am sure u must definelty not have given much thought...But at this point of time one try to manipulate the pros and cons of every realtionship n from there starts the debacle...How nice it would have been if we would have the feeling of then and maturity of now...abslolutely causeless and pure !!!